normally im not reminscent and reflective of the past year. or all my years in nus thus far. but considering that this is my final year, Insya'Allah, i'm beginning to feel as if the last three years have gone by somewhat fast, and uneventfully. however, it is not the case. crazily as it seems, many things have happened within the last three years that may or may not change the way i think, the way i feel and the way i treat others. the last few days were a bunch of misery filled events from getting blasted by the vice-provost for my lack of professionalism and responsibility. i was quite surprised by her reaction and mine. i felt angry at her remarks, yet at the same time, i felt that i could have done a lot better in achieving her expectations of me as an undergraduate and as a senior. in response to her email, i sincerely apologised stating a reason but maturely dismissed it as an excuse for my behaviour. perhaps finally i'm beginning to grow up. that doesnt include the first of my wisdom teeth to show/grow.

the friends i've made during my years in uni will remain with me as long as i live, Insya'Allah. i cant remember where i read it. i'll alter it to my taste. heh. but the philosophy is simple. when you meet someone, you are like kaya and the other person is the butter. when u put them together, they become a nice pair. when u take them out, bits of butter will stick to the kaya and vice versa. that's how life is when u really touch someone's heart and soul. Insya'Allah, i've done that more than i am able to achieve and that I can really pass whatever knowledge that I have gained from others to other people. perhaps that's what life is about. who knows ya?

im still searching for myself. Alhamdullillah, i have friends around to guide me. and i'm thankful for the strength i've gained the last few months, and the experience to enable me to get past the next few. Insya'Allah, i'll make the right decision regarding my future while still establishing the right sort of image in doing so. Not that I would want to hurt anyone's feelings, but everyman is selfish and they take care of their own first. I've been hurt and hurt others. they say it's karma. perhaps it is true. but everything does happen for a reason. So I pray that God will give me strength, wisdom and patience in deciding for the future. Amin.