i dont read that much these days, thus nothing major to write about. sometimes i'll write about something that i'll come across. while i'll just not write about other stuff and be totally confusing in the process.
well. i've been trying to make sense of things of late. like the small things that you always take for granted. the small hellos. the handshakes. the hugs. the kisses. just practically about anything related to a relationship with another person. well. not with people you like of course. anyway, if any of you have read up till here, please do note that this post is going to be super long, like a part of a section of a thesis. so either you read, and get a hold of what's going on, or you could simply leave.
"people always leave"
i used to have this pic where it says that statement. well i still do have it. interestingly, it's apt. somewhat. call my cynical. call me naive. but it's just what happens. a statement contrary to that would say, "dont get too attached" for then it would mean a whole lot when someone leaves. well how does one not get attached to another? maybe my life is just like that. so i shouldnt be fighting it. and embracing it. *shrugs* it's not like i never tried to keep in touch. i do. but sometimes it just gets too much when u're the only one trying. puts u in a perspective that maybe it's not worth it. or not. i really dont know.
"lost"
i was watching the most recent episode of lost. sun lost something and she was having this conversation with john where john simply said..and im not quoting.. that to find something, u simply stop looking. sometimes u gotta have faith. well, i think so. but this ep is quite ironic as well lar. cos i went thru it before. when certain things are meant to be lost, they stay lost. even if u can try to replace it, the original one will always be lost. some of the times, when u lose things, you can never find them. no matter how hard you try. cos it's not meant to be. not meant to be found.
"searching for oneself"
can anyone truly search for what they are capable of, or can they ever reach the point where they are truly contented? i dont know. i've been lost so many times before and i still am. but i always had someone, or something guiding me properly. but i never. NEVER did take heed. most of the time. the whole point of me gg to europe was to have fun and really find out about the world. maybe that's why i wanted to be a pilot so much. and was really upset when the knee injury came up. sometimes when u want to make choices in life, life already makes choices for you. some bad, some good. but probably good. u gotta see the big picture here.
"friendship"
ask yourself whether you respect your friend as a person. ask yourself whether you're taking your friend for granted. friendship is never about you. neither is it about your friend. it's about the two of you. two hands can make a clap. f would say otherwise but she's not typing this. i am. heh. this story is something that one might share, or one might already know, depending on how close you are to me.
one time, i was crushing on this person. let's call her nadiah(true name will be hidden to protect identity). anyway, i was keen in asking her out. but somewhat a close fren at that time, well we played soccer together and bummed most of the time, went out with her and had something going on with her. but something happened between them and id rather not say. anyway, to cut a long story short, i asked him whether i could ask her out. not becos i wanna be a prick and rub salt into wounds. but i thought that as a friend, i should at least let him know my intentions. i mean it is a free country. yeah. u can do anything u want. u can marry my wife if u want but that's just wrong. okay side tracked for a while. i told him out of respect. he was definitely not happy about it. but it will sink in. but whatever it is. he got it from you. if he's truly upset about it, and if the friendship is truly something u can cherish, den why let a girl get in the way. *shrugs*
but of course, pricks do happen in nature. they exist. they go totally against all norms and do have the idea that since it's a free country, they can do about anything that they want. well, it's an unwritten rule. no matter what. *shrugs*
"breaking up and patching up again"
i dont believe in it. never will. either you're on. or you're off.
"the whole issue that's been bugging me since yesteryear.well sort of."
read somewhere. about loving someone. is it really enough? i dont tink so. yeah. u could argue that ur parents never divorced and they are still married despite everything and are still together 50 years down the road. i will be happy if i do get married and still be with my wife 50 years later. cos that would mean im not dead. heh. but seriously, is love ever enough? is all about compromises and living with each other's ups and downs. playing with each other's strengths and weaknesses. taking care of the heart. not about love. well i know some couples do love each other 50 years down the road. they hug, they kiss, they hold hands when they walk. hey, call me an old fool. but i would do that 50 years down the road. and not jus cos i cant walk or i cant see very clearly. heh. canot think that far.
i shall say love gets you to where you are. but where you are going to go, a whole lot more sacrifices need to be made. if u cant make that simple sacrifice of calling your partner for 5 mins every now and then to see how they are, NOT to check up and hound them to come home (heh) even when u're piling up with readings, ur room is a mess and what not. i tell you. THAT FREAKING FIVE MINUTES is worth it. you will regret it if you dont call. call ah. now. SERIOUSLY. if you're late. the moment has passed. u cant get it back.
i dont ask for much. if ppl who really know me (i doubt there are many out there). i may say i want a adidas jacket or a pair of new shoes for my birthday. or maybe even a crumpler bag (hint hint) but seriously, they are just things. they can just tear and get lost or stolen. it's way cool if u get presents. but if you dont, think of what you had.
all i asked from my friends for my birthday was simple. i asked for nothing. and i got about almost everything.
spending that day at forum with fab four and f was really amazing. just a simple dinner. and a whole load of picture taking after that. it is a nice present. just spending some time with people whom u care about. and they made the effort to do so. so i guess in that way, im touched. really am.
well. how about this? how about you planning a day where we do something. something new. something fun. something unimaginable. just 24 hours. you can slack. u can run. u can go johor. or u can just play monopoly till u buy hotels for each space. *shrugs* it's not a matter of $$ but the matter of you sacrificing your time despite your busy schedules to spent time with your friends. means a whole lot more.
id rather have a day with you. than a present. but u gotta plan the day. heh.
last but not least.
love.
ah. call me sappy. but yeah. nuff said. realli. heh. complicate this four letter word and yeah. u pretty much screw up everything.
advice.
1) always be honest with each other
2) do not take things for granted
3) say i love you when u can.
4) sms once in a while to show you care
5) set the person free
sounds a whole lot easier when u're typing. heh. if u can do it, let me know.
i cross checked with microsoft word. nearly a 1500 words. wow. i could have finished my essay by now. EMOTIONS essay. hmm..
whenever you are feeling sad
sometimes you get a little bit mad
why not smile instead
cos God has a plan ahead
i cant smile these days. can you make me smile?
well. i've been trying to make sense of things of late. like the small things that you always take for granted. the small hellos. the handshakes. the hugs. the kisses. just practically about anything related to a relationship with another person. well. not with people you like of course. anyway, if any of you have read up till here, please do note that this post is going to be super long, like a part of a section of a thesis. so either you read, and get a hold of what's going on, or you could simply leave.
"people always leave"
i used to have this pic where it says that statement. well i still do have it. interestingly, it's apt. somewhat. call my cynical. call me naive. but it's just what happens. a statement contrary to that would say, "dont get too attached" for then it would mean a whole lot when someone leaves. well how does one not get attached to another? maybe my life is just like that. so i shouldnt be fighting it. and embracing it. *shrugs* it's not like i never tried to keep in touch. i do. but sometimes it just gets too much when u're the only one trying. puts u in a perspective that maybe it's not worth it. or not. i really dont know.
"lost"
i was watching the most recent episode of lost. sun lost something and she was having this conversation with john where john simply said..and im not quoting.. that to find something, u simply stop looking. sometimes u gotta have faith. well, i think so. but this ep is quite ironic as well lar. cos i went thru it before. when certain things are meant to be lost, they stay lost. even if u can try to replace it, the original one will always be lost. some of the times, when u lose things, you can never find them. no matter how hard you try. cos it's not meant to be. not meant to be found.
"searching for oneself"
can anyone truly search for what they are capable of, or can they ever reach the point where they are truly contented? i dont know. i've been lost so many times before and i still am. but i always had someone, or something guiding me properly. but i never. NEVER did take heed. most of the time. the whole point of me gg to europe was to have fun and really find out about the world. maybe that's why i wanted to be a pilot so much. and was really upset when the knee injury came up. sometimes when u want to make choices in life, life already makes choices for you. some bad, some good. but probably good. u gotta see the big picture here.
"friendship"
ask yourself whether you respect your friend as a person. ask yourself whether you're taking your friend for granted. friendship is never about you. neither is it about your friend. it's about the two of you. two hands can make a clap. f would say otherwise but she's not typing this. i am. heh. this story is something that one might share, or one might already know, depending on how close you are to me.
one time, i was crushing on this person. let's call her nadiah(true name will be hidden to protect identity). anyway, i was keen in asking her out. but somewhat a close fren at that time, well we played soccer together and bummed most of the time, went out with her and had something going on with her. but something happened between them and id rather not say. anyway, to cut a long story short, i asked him whether i could ask her out. not becos i wanna be a prick and rub salt into wounds. but i thought that as a friend, i should at least let him know my intentions. i mean it is a free country. yeah. u can do anything u want. u can marry my wife if u want but that's just wrong. okay side tracked for a while. i told him out of respect. he was definitely not happy about it. but it will sink in. but whatever it is. he got it from you. if he's truly upset about it, and if the friendship is truly something u can cherish, den why let a girl get in the way. *shrugs*
but of course, pricks do happen in nature. they exist. they go totally against all norms and do have the idea that since it's a free country, they can do about anything that they want. well, it's an unwritten rule. no matter what. *shrugs*
"breaking up and patching up again"
i dont believe in it. never will. either you're on. or you're off.
"the whole issue that's been bugging me since yesteryear.well sort of."
read somewhere. about loving someone. is it really enough? i dont tink so. yeah. u could argue that ur parents never divorced and they are still married despite everything and are still together 50 years down the road. i will be happy if i do get married and still be with my wife 50 years later. cos that would mean im not dead. heh. but seriously, is love ever enough? is all about compromises and living with each other's ups and downs. playing with each other's strengths and weaknesses. taking care of the heart. not about love. well i know some couples do love each other 50 years down the road. they hug, they kiss, they hold hands when they walk. hey, call me an old fool. but i would do that 50 years down the road. and not jus cos i cant walk or i cant see very clearly. heh. canot think that far.
i shall say love gets you to where you are. but where you are going to go, a whole lot more sacrifices need to be made. if u cant make that simple sacrifice of calling your partner for 5 mins every now and then to see how they are, NOT to check up and hound them to come home (heh) even when u're piling up with readings, ur room is a mess and what not. i tell you. THAT FREAKING FIVE MINUTES is worth it. you will regret it if you dont call. call ah. now. SERIOUSLY. if you're late. the moment has passed. u cant get it back.
i dont ask for much. if ppl who really know me (i doubt there are many out there). i may say i want a adidas jacket or a pair of new shoes for my birthday. or maybe even a crumpler bag (hint hint) but seriously, they are just things. they can just tear and get lost or stolen. it's way cool if u get presents. but if you dont, think of what you had.
all i asked from my friends for my birthday was simple. i asked for nothing. and i got about almost everything.
spending that day at forum with fab four and f was really amazing. just a simple dinner. and a whole load of picture taking after that. it is a nice present. just spending some time with people whom u care about. and they made the effort to do so. so i guess in that way, im touched. really am.
well. how about this? how about you planning a day where we do something. something new. something fun. something unimaginable. just 24 hours. you can slack. u can run. u can go johor. or u can just play monopoly till u buy hotels for each space. *shrugs* it's not a matter of $$ but the matter of you sacrificing your time despite your busy schedules to spent time with your friends. means a whole lot more.
id rather have a day with you. than a present. but u gotta plan the day. heh.
last but not least.
love.
ah. call me sappy. but yeah. nuff said. realli. heh. complicate this four letter word and yeah. u pretty much screw up everything.
advice.
1) always be honest with each other
2) do not take things for granted
3) say i love you when u can.
4) sms once in a while to show you care
5) set the person free
sounds a whole lot easier when u're typing. heh. if u can do it, let me know.
i cross checked with microsoft word. nearly a 1500 words. wow. i could have finished my essay by now. EMOTIONS essay. hmm..
whenever you are feeling sad
sometimes you get a little bit mad
why not smile instead
cos God has a plan ahead
i cant smile these days. can you make me smile?
posted by Shan at 10:22 AM
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